A weekend on my own

Writing this on my phone. Sunday morning. I was planning for a morning walk then as I change clothes. The rain slaps. I pray I get a nice walk with beautiful weather & air in an hour. Aamiin. So I switch to hanging out + breakfast on the balcony. 

I had trouble sleeping last night. The mistake I made is upsetting. I feel worst. It's like I'm trying to do my job as well as possible. Then something slaps. I just wanna be competent at my job. Seen as competent. I don't know how to comfort myself. 

The rest of yesterday was good though. Having time to fully spend time for myself. I work out, enjoyed myself cooking. I made caramelised onion. I prep chicken. I did my room & took out the trash. It made me feel good. Except the fact I cried because I miss my family (particularly I want hugs like old times) seeing my mom post pictures of my dad with breakfast. I have to fight the thoughts of not coming home out of regret. Allah protect them please. 

It is a week,

TGiaH